A snowball's chance in Hell
by whitewistaria
Summary: "He had been a dad for five days. A proud dad of the most beautiful baby he'd ever seen. A dead dad, if he didn't find soon the child car seat his wife had told him to buy  a month ago." Tony and Jeanne's long-overdue chat but TIVA all the way


**This is not Jeanne's bashing. I don't like her, but I feel quite sorry for her, so in this story she's not a killer, nor a psychopath, just a woman who's been hurt. That said, it's TIVA and only TIVA.**

**Thanks to the people who have reviewed my previous story. I'm planning a sequel, but it could be a while before I'll come up with something good enough to post, and I won't have internet for the whole next week.**

**HAPPY NEW YEAR TO EVERYBODY! **

**Disclaimer: guess what? I don't own it. **

Antony DiNozzo was many things: he was a special agent, often a jerk, an ex commitment-phobic serial-dater, an ex frat-boy (although his wife often said his maturity was that of a twenty years old) and, among other things, a loving husband. He had also been a dad for five days. A proud dad of the most beautiful baby he'd ever seen. A dead dad, if he didn't find soon the child car seat his wife had told him to buy a month ago. And today his beautiful, caring, deadly wife and his perfect daughter would be discharged. In how many ways could Ziva kill him with a diaper?

So he was frantically searching the shop for a fitting car seat. It was more easily said than done. Did Ziva know how many car seats there were? What should he buy? The cheapest, the most expensive, because it'd probably be safer, the most colorful, what?

"Antony DiNozzo in a baby shop. Maybe that snowball really has a chance in Hell, after all."

Tony raised his eyes "Uh, hi Jeanne." His ex-girl-friend of eight years ago was standing right in front of him. He wanted to say something clever, apologize or something like that. Instead his brain had decided that was the right moment to take a break. So, he stood there with a car seat in the hand, awkwardly looking at Jeanne, while she watched him with an evil eye. _She has put some weight on_ he decided, and immediately prayed he hadn't said it aloud. Well, no slap, no kick, no verbal assault, maybe his brain was still working after all.

"So uhm, how are you?" He said.

"I'm fine now, thanks." She really couldn't help saying that bitchy _now._ To tell the truth, things had been well for years. Yes she had been destroyed, her heart shattered in more pieces she thought possible, but nothing a little time in Gabon with people with real problems couldn't heal. Yet, it was quite difficult not to be angry with him when he looked so good with a few lines on his handsome face and a little gray in his hair. He was hotter than she remembered. All this while she was feeling worse than ever. _Oh I know what you're thinking. Hey look at her, she seems a whale. Well, for your information, Mr. Perfect, I've just had a baby! Okay, it was three months ago, but it's perfectly normal to have some baby weight left. I'd like to see you having a baby!"_ She didn't even notice that the last thought didn't make any sense.

"I'm glad for you." And his tone was so sincere that she felt almost bad for being angry. _Almost._

"And you?"

"Oh, I'm fine, thank you. Or I will be fine once I finally buy a car seat. Otherwise I'm dead."

She had to smile at that. "Is it for a baby shower?"

"Oh no. it's, uhm, it's for my daughter."

_You really had to ask, right? What are you, masochist? Now you find a plausible excuse and go away from here. Immediately._

It wasn't that she didn't love her husband, nor she regretted marrying him. And her son. She really didn't know how she could have lived without him. It was that someone had got the man she once wanted to live with, the same man who had a panic attack every time she mentioned the words _wallpaper with flower fantasy, _ to marry her and go into a baby shop and be perfectly fine with that.

She was jealous of this woman_. But just a little._ And yes, a little upset. Like when you're the best in your high school class then you go to the college and everybody is better than you. _It must be my hormones' level. Sure, they're not back to normal yet. No other reasons. Absolutely._

"You're married-he said nodding to the ring on her left hand- I'm happy for you. You know, I-I owe you some apologies. Some long-overdue apologies." He awkwardly chuckled, passing a hand through his hair. "Yeah, maybe I should've thought about this eight years ago, or at least seven, but…well, I was quite angry too, and…anyway I'm sorry. For everything."

"Oh no. No, you don't walk away that easily. I've been through hell because of you. I've waited for you, for a text, a letter, anything for almost a year! And you think a little _sorry_ is enough? Not in a million years Tony ."

"You accused me of murder! What could you pretend after that? " Even after eight years there was some hurt in his eyes.

Everybody in the shop were looking at them; they had raised their voices quite a bit without even noticing.

After a quiet moment Jeanne said sighing "I'm sorry for that. I knew you couldn't have done it. I was just…too blind with rage and sorrow to think clearly." _No, I didn't say that. He's the one who needs to apologize. What the Hell were you thinking? Hormones. Their fault. Again._

"Yeah, I understand. Well, again, I'm truly sorry, Jeanne. For what's worth."

"Yes"

"Right"

Another long moment of silence. Tony was looking at the other people in the shop, while Jeanne was observing the car seats.

"I bought that for my son, and it works fine." She said, really not knowing why she was offering an advice to HIM.

"Really? That one? Oh, thank you Jeanne, you're really saving my life." And he gave her his big smile, that made her heart ache a little.

"You know Tony, women like to make threats, but they're always empty. " She smiled and for a moment their closeness was back.

He chuckled "Oh no, they're NOT empty when they come from Ziva. She probably could kill me in fourteen different ways with a nursing bottle. But I'm fine with it. She's the one I needed to- he glanced at Jeanne and realized his faux pas- but you don't want to hear about her. Sorry"

She probably had only imagined their closeness back. Now they couldn't be more far away from each other.

"You mentioned you had a son," He said after a while.

Jeanne's eyes were sparkling with happiness now, "Yes. He's three months old and he's my…my everything. I know I probably sound cheesy, but really, I needed him even if I didn't know I needed him." She thought about what she had said. "Well, that probably doesn't make any sense-"

"No I perfectly got it." He said with a serious expression.

And with that, she was suddenly aware that they didn't know each other anymore. They were different people, with families and responsibilities, and she was okay with that. _It's time to let the anger go, to let him finally walk away from my life._

"Anyway, that's the right choice, if you want my advice". She said pointing at the car seat.

"Yes, thank you."

"Well, I should go."

"Yeah, me too. I'm glad we could talk."

"Yes."

"Goodbye Jeanne."

"Goodbye Tony."

Watching him leaving, she thought back to their conversation. When she first saw him in the shop, she almost wanted to rip his head off. Instead, she had ended up giving him some advice and actually forgiving him.

_Maybe there had been another snowball having a chance in Hell, after all._

**I've reposted this because I noticed some grammar errors and, as I told you, I hate them. I apologize if there're others I didn't see. My only excuse is that English isn't my first language. Oh and it was pretty late when I came up with this.**


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